If you found this post, then you were meant to see this. I think you already know, that you are not good at blending in. And thank goodness for that.
It probably shows up in many ways in your life, and I’ll get more into that in this post and finally I’ll talk about how crocheting your own clothes is a great way to embrace your uniqueness and learn to accept yourself and be visible in the world.
Standing out is not about being more special than everyone else, it’s about how we see and treat the world and ourselves. It’s about being authentic, free, everchanging and not having to fit into the norm to be good enough. So whether you are already standing out and want confirmation of how powerful it is to do so, or if you dream of being better at standing out (standing out is brave!) and not caring what others think, then read on.
Crochet medieval top with puff sleeves, lace stitch down the middle and ruffle edge
Why are we so desperate to blend in?
Nowadays it seems that we all need to look the same, wear the same clothes, get the same surgeries, buy the same stuff, create the same social media content to be successful or be seen at all.
Have you ever thought about why this is?
I have two theories. I believe it is about blending in, feeling accepted and successful by copy-pasting what our friends, favourite models, influencers and fashion brands are doing and at the same time being indoctrinated since birth to hold certain beliefs from our parents and those around us that we deemed to have it “figure out”, even if these beliefs are not even in alignment with ourselves. Oftentimes we are completely unaware of this and if we aren’t forced to reflect on it, it will continue to happen.
On the other side of that same coin, I think it is also this: fear about being yourself.
Because if you stand out and look different, if you dress differently or have different opinions, you are more likely to be ridiculed, misunderstood or cast outut (our biggest fear as humans), not being a part of the herd, because that would mean death in our primitive society.
We want to fit in to feel safe. But remember what is lost in the process. You.
But what if it didn’t have to mean death to stand out? What if it liberated you, made you see yourself clearer, love yourself and live authentically? We don’t live in a primitive society anymore, and there are people like you out there who also don’t want to fit in. People you would be able to belong to even if it came to being an outcast. And if being yourself would mean being rejected by your people, are they even people you want to belong to in the first place?
Why blindly following trends can be dangerous
It’s not just boring to follow trends. It can be dangerous. Not just because we lose our individuality and authentic expression, but because being uniform as a society equals being more easily controlled. Controlled by the government, by those around you, by the media, etc. Someone who is washing out their uniqeness and individuality is someone who becomes more and more wiped out – who is even in there in the end?
Crochet top with mesh stitches and bra cups
But our awareness on the matter can help us be more authentic. Our parents, teachers or friends can be our inspiration and guides, but they don’t have to dictate who we should become or how we should dress. As an example, I was used to being slutshamed for wearing specific items, and it took me 30 years to undo this belief that tops that showed my collarbone was slutty. I took everyone’s beliefs at face value, was not encouraged to trust my own gut and as a result I lived a dishonest life, where I felt I had to please others in every way, even down to what I was wearing. God forbid I made someone uncomfortable with what I was wearing, even though I loved it. Even my best friend shamed my clothing, because I think she was uncomfortable to be seen with someone like me, who stood out and looked different. Because that meant that she, too, stood out and was different.
We want to fit in to feel safe. But remember what you have to give up in the process.
You.
Crochet clothes makes you stand out
Why I think crochet clothes is a great way to embrace your uniqueness and learn to stand out, is because it is such a unique craft. It can’t be made by machine, so it will always be handmade and the possibilities are endless. You can literally make anything in any way you want and customize it exactly how you like it. It is also kind of cute to wear clothes made of yarn and we are so used to knitted clothes that crochet is not a far leap from that.
I don’t think I have ever seen someone wear a full crochet outfit in real life except for myself and my friends who I have crocheted clothes for.
Crochet clothes is so rare and unique, and you always know it’s made by hand, making it look and feel so exclusive! At the same time you show that you are slow fashion person, and that says a lot about you. As we know, our clothes can reflect our personality, and what better way to show who we are than to wear something we made with our own two hands. It truly shows that you are confident, proud of your abilities and that you love yourself (just think of the hours and hours you have spent crocheting this item!!). I think that’s love in the shape of quality time spent on yourself.
Crochet mini skirt with elastic waist and crochet tube top with elastic edge
Moreover, there’s been this belief in the knit and crochet community that “crochet is not wearable” because it’s too warm and bulky. But have you tried a 3 or 4 mm hook and some fine cotton yarn (or other natural fibers)? Yes, it does take a bit longer to make but it’s so worth it! It gives such a delicate and beautful texture that is soft and wearable without being too warm in summer and it doesn’t have to be see-through or worn over spanx or a slip dress. And also, who doesn’t like a bulky crochet sweater? If someone tells me crochet clothes don’t work you better believe I will be wearing even more crochet clothes just to prove to myself that it’s not just possible but enjoyable.
Crochet clothes and trends
Crochet clothes might have always been in style in one way or another, so wearing crochet doesn’t necessarily mean defying the trends, but oftentimes what is trendy in the crochet world are the specific type of crochet stitches: chunky styles, mesh, lace or the very typical crochet stitch: granny squares.
Something that is not so popular is to use crochet clothes as a way to mimic regular fabric clothes, and here’s where my crochet patterns come in. Many of them are meant to be a substitute for fabric clothes and the stitches are not the main star – rather the simplistic and versatile designs are, because they are meant to make it easy for you to make it in your own style and to have it be everyday clothes that can be styled with the rest of your clothes. I do believe, even though granny square dresses and such, are quite trendy in the crochet world, it is still quite unique to see someone wear it in our everyday life – this is just proof that even the trendy crochet is style very avantgarde and special and there are a ton of different stitches to try out, and combined with a beautiful crochet design you are unstoppable.
Crocheting your own clothes means following your own style
No matter if you are beginner or seasoned crocheter, crocheting your own clothes means being able to customise the clothes exactly to your liking and style and embracing our own uniqueness, making it that much easier for you to stand out and own your own style.
You never have to try and fit in again because you are meant for so much more than being a copy-paste of everyone else. You were meant to stand out.
How to crochet for beginners
Crochet romantic top with puff sleeves and lace stitches
You can stand out in many ways with crochet clothes, whether that be using specific colours and stripes, adding embroidery or extra details like beads, elastic, hearts or bows. You can also use the trendy stitches in new creative ways like mixing them with simpler stitches or use advanced stitches and make a very simple design with them – or go all out and try free form crocheting!
Or you could even style a crochet item with another crochet item to create a full crochet outfit – something that is rarely seen anywhere in the public sphere. Crochet is just as great for clothes as knit. But, unlike knit, will always be handmade, yet it has all the same possiblities as knitted clothes.
You can also try some of my self-invented crochet stitches (or come up with your own) – this is a great way to make unique crochet clothes, cause there are unlimited variations of your well-known crochet stitches, and many fun ways you can also combine them!
Crochet mesh top with waist band and a unique stitch I invented
Minimalism, slow fashion & how I found crochet
My patterns are not particulary revloutionary, cause people have been crocheting clothes for decades although knit has always been a bit more typical for clothing.
Back in the 1970’s they made tons of crochet patterns like mine, where simple stitches are used and it might as well have been a knitted or regular fabric item.
I grew up with a mother who would sew and knit clothes for us. We wore our big siblings old clothes when they grew out of it and we learnt to sew, crochet and knit. Since then I started my own crochet business which I made the first design for back in 2015, when I had tried to sew a dress and failed and wanted an easier approach to making my own clothes. With crochet it was so easy, because I could make everything in one piece and try it on along the way, instea of having to cut and sew different parts of the item togetger.
I already knew the basic stitches and very quickly I started developing my designs – the clothing styles I had always wanted, but couldn’t find anywhere. I created something that wasn’t there already and I was forced to do things my own way and embrace my own style – and it paid off!
I hope we can return to the simpler times; when making our own clothes was as normal as buying groceries – every household did something by hand and crafting was just a part of life, and when something was worn out we repaired it. More sustainable, minimalistic and less wasteful and fast.
Crochet is freedom. With crochet you don’t just have the creative freedom to make it in any style you want. You also have the freedom in setting yourself free of societal standards by wearing something different from everyone else. But you also have the practical and physical freedom in starting and stopping anywhere on your crochet project, making it perfect for freestyling or undoing what you’re not satisfied with (knit and sewing is more limited).
Learning to wear crochet clothes
Not many people know this, but for the first many many years of designing crochet clothes I never actually wore it.
I was too ashamed of not just myself and my style, but also what I had created. I was so judgemental and felt I was never good enough. I saw every little mistake I had made, mistakes that I think not anyone else would have even noticed.
We are often our own worst critic – another reminder that being yourself is not easy. But it is brave though.
I started to practice to wear my crochet clothes more often and wear it outdoors. I realised people would stare a lot, never smile or just ignore me completely. No one ever complimented it, so I had to continuously see the value in myself and my creative process.
Very slowly I started appreciating my own creations and how amazing it was that I was able to create all this with my own two hands. I think taking photos and seeing my customer’s photos, made me see it from a whole new perspective, and this online community as well as learnin to wear and love my crochet clothes (and not be so hard and judgemental of myself) was an important part of my self-love journey – I learned to love myself and my crochet for the first time ever.
You don’t have to wait to wear that special item. Wear it today.
Something I have learnt recently that it’s not about waiting for that special occasion to wear something beautiful. It’s about wearing something beautiful every time I want to, because the being I am will always be beautiful and it will always be worthy of wearing beautiful things.
Crochet flower and leaf earrrings
Here are some tips to help you make and follow your own style instead of following trends:
Colors
Start by figuring out what colours you like looking at and start wearing that. Yes, even if those around you are not weraing that color, and the fashion houses and models and influencers are all avoiding that color. Same goes for cuts, patterns etc.
Body shape
Now figure out what kind of body shape you have and what fits your body type. What balances out your body? If you are bigger on top go for patterns, details and width on your bottom. Just because low rise pants are in style, it doesn’t mean it is what fits you or what you like. But also you can also do the opposite and stop obeying what fits your body type and just wear what you think looks good.
Style
You don’t have to go for just one style – but you can experiment by looking at the different types of styles and which ones speak to you. Are you more into sporty clothes, romantic style the simplistic and minimalistic look or maybe a flamboyant and colorful type of style? You might be a bit of everything, and that’s okay! Or you might switch it up every now and then. You don’t have to stick to just one look.
Old tv shows and movies
Watch old TV shows or movies to figure out what you like and pay attention to what they are wearing or the style they have. You can also think about your favourite characters and look at what they are wearing and which of it you like/don’t like – and WHY.
Be reflective
Ask yourself: why do I I get the need to follow this trend, buy this top, search for those shoes? What will that give me? Acceptance? And why do I need that? Could I get that in another, healthier way? Do I NEED to look like everyone else? Why?
Listen to yourself
If you start to think “but people will look at me/judge me/reject me” or “this is not even in style, it looks so bad/nerdy/outdated/weird”. Just stop and ask yourself where those beliefs come from? And why you should listen to them and not what YOU want and like.
Crochet romantic top with mesh stitches, ruffle straps, ruffle edge and bra cups
Be uncomfortable
It’s better to be uncomfortable and free than comfortable and controlled.
Practise to feel uncomfortable when you start doing what feels good to you – you might think that the discomfort means you’re doing something wrong, but it’s often the opposite, especially when learning to undo this everyday brainwash. I remember something I heard once: “the first thought you get is what you were taught to think, your second thought is what YOU believe”. It doesn’t always work, sometimes it’s the opposite – but try it the next time you try to follow your own style and bring awareness to those beliefs.
It might be comfortable to follow trends because it’s safe and reliable and you know that you will be accepted. So therefore it might feel uncomfortable to follow your own trends. But little by little by doing this you will feel more comfortable doing what you want to do rather than doing what others want you to do. See it as a rebellion and act of freedom to be able to wear what you want. Because the more easy it is for you to blindly follow trends, and do what everyone else is doing, the more easy it is to control you in others aspects, and is that what you want? Being a slave to our society and the beliefs that we have as a whole?
Crochet co-ord with mesh and double crochet and half double crochet