Picture this: you have been working on something, indulging yourself in the process, being so creative and expressive, written, taken photos or videos, editing it, admiring your talents and abilities in the creation process and as soon as you click “post” there is silence.
Maybe you are not getting any response at all. Maybe your work is not being seen enough. Maybe you feel that you drown out among all the other amazing posts out there. Maybe no one is liking or very few. Maybe no one is sharing your work or commenting. It can feel like such an anti-climax to have found so much joy, peace or excitement about something you have created and the world doesn’t seem to notice or appreciate it.
Appreciating yourself & the process
Ask yourself if you are truly appreciating your process, who you are and how amazing it is that you have created this and expressed yourself. Or are you more focused on the physical aspect of finishing a product and expecting to get something in return?
First of all it is natural and healthy to get validation from the world, it is needed in order for us to feel OK and feel connected and important in the world. It is not to say that it is enough to care about it yourself – expecting others to care is just as important. But if we only expect others to care and we don’t care ourselves, then it becomes very vulnerable to share because we rely 100% on others opinions – and bare in mind that the response or lack thereof that we get from social media is not a reflection of how worthy we or our creations are.
Practise to really prioritize putting yourself first, notice what it is you love about your creations, who you are and your process. Write a list of everything that is important to you in creating or what it is that is special about you – it doesn’t have to be something other people don’t contain – but what is it you enjoy about your own creations? If you were a stranger looking from the outside on you and your creations, what are some things they might notice or admire about you? Learn to enjoy your own process, feel the joy and induldge in it, excite yourself and let the posting and social media aspect be a less important thing in the process.
Following the social media “rules”
I think there is importance in doing the things necessary to be seen on social media – even if it still means that we still struggle with it. Make sure you are posting regularly or consistently – like not posting 10 posts after each other on your feed, as they will drown out eachother. Posting reels often. Sharing in your story. Making hashtags. Bringing something of value or something people can interact with – like asking a question or for an opinion from people.
Are you engaging with other people on social media? sharing other’s work (with no expectation of getting anything in return?)
You are not for everyone, and that’s okay!
First of all it is totally valid to feel insecure, upset or disappointed that you are not getting the recognition that you deserve. Give yourself permission to feel that it sucks and that you don’t have to accept that this is the fact.
Second of all, start challenging the beliefs that just because people don’t seem to like or interact with your creations doesn’t mean that they don’t like it.
Of course there will always be people who don’t like you or your work – not everyone is for everyone. Even the most talented people in the world, the most successful or most beautiful people in the world still have haters or people who simply don’t like to follow along. That doesn’t mean something is wrong with any of these people – it just means we are all different and on social media we all look for something in particular.
You matter, you are worthy & your creations are valuable
Maybe you have not yet found your crowd – the people that really value what you have to share. or maybe they don’t know you exist yet. That is not to say that you need to necessarily make yourself even more visible – maybe it is just timing, maybe it takes a while to be noticed.
I want to challenge you to visualise that there are people out there that have not found you yet that are looking for someone exactly like you; with your approach and your creations. Someone who thinks “YES finally! someone whose posts I can’t get enough of, where I get so excited everytime I see a post from them”. Think about someone you like to follow – and imagine that someone could feel that way about you too! Maybe there already is someone.
Embrace the fact that no one cares
Unfortunately we also tend to focus on everything that we lack – all the likes we didn’t get (compared to that profile that gets hundreds or thoudsands of likes), all the people that don’t support us, all the followers we don’t have.
Even if you only got 1 like, hell even if you like me have multiple profiles and the 1 like is from yourself – so what?
If no one else cares, make it priority that you care. Practise to embrace the emptiness, the silence, the cold shoulder you get when you feel like no one cares if you post or not, no one cares what you have to say or share, no one finds you interesting.
It can be a positive too! If no one cares you can do whatever you want. Post 10 times a day. Post photos with bad lighting or low quality. Screw the social media rules and do whatever you want with it. Be “too much”. Be a healthy narcissist; post photos you love and write a caption about why you love it so much. Care less about getting others to engage or respond to you and focus more on indulging in your own process, your own worth, your own desires, your own passions – why YOU love it so much. Learn to say more “So what if no one cares?”.
At least if you care enough about it yourself you will also eventually attract people that appreciate you, that beenfit from the way you are in the world and on social media.
I have posted content to my other social media profiles regularly for 6 and 14 years and I get comments from the same 1-4 people. Sometimes I get 2 likes even though the content has been viewed hundreds of times.
I also have not had any goal with sharing other than just share my passion – but recently it has sucked more and more that I find so much value in what I share and the interest is not growing for other people.
I am not interested in making content for other people. I am interested in making content that I like to make. Maybe that won’t benefit me in return but at leats I am staying true to my process. Once again it is a priority – do I want lots of responses and make something I don’t care about or do I want little response and make something I care about?